The School Species- The Popular Kids

We all know them. We all secretly hate them. And yet we don't even realise the inner workings of such an important species in the lands of Schooltopia. So, if you really want to find out why these tormentors are really our Mentors, read on, dear reader...

On your first day of school it is still possible to notice a certain species by the name of the "Popularums". As with most species, the female is the most vicious, only with the Popularums their weapon being snarky comments, and beautiful couture. The female is easy to decipher, as it has the distinct markings of freshly died hair, and faux leather handbags. They are group animals, and most of the females will only survive if quickly integrated into a group, but their queen, who can be seen leading the pack, generally being mean to all not in her inner circle, can survive alone, with the protection of her all-round perfection. Their natural habitat is out of the main areas in school, or, if allowed, outside of school. They feed of a diet of others misery, hairspray, and paper to make them look thin. If confronted by a female Popularum, remember to choose one of these three options: Hide, run, or integrate into a passing group of Geekiuses (geeks are the best protection as they are seen as an offering to the popularums). 

The male Popularum, however, is harder to spot. His marking are an air of unkemptnus, sweat, and loud noise. They are also group animals, but are able to survive alone, with their weapons being banter, maiming, and insensitive comments. They naturally attach themselves to an existing group of female Popularums, and try to impress them. While they are not evil like the females, they are still cruel, and it is wise to stay clear of them. If confronted, banter back, hide, or run. Those are the only options of survival. They enjoy sport, so some protection would be given if you are good at literally ANY  sport. 

Finally, one of my findings. 75% of Popularums don't consider themselves to be popular. I sent an email to all of my year group, and only 25% of the popular kids actually said they were popular. That's pretty interesting, isn't it? If you think so, comment down below, and tell us if you have ever been confronted by the Popularums before. Thank you, MangoHub!